So I have been getting a little stressed lately. Trying to plan my life in a very unpredictable world is hard. I may have signed up for some training that all happens in the same few weeks. And its spazing me out. Beyond a bit of OCD having all these things up in the air is really uncomfortable. I realized that I am not in my happy place. I have lost touch of the one thing that keeps me calm. Or more likely, less stressed. This balancing point is different for everyone. You should take stock of what it is for you and when the world gets to spinning you can find a way to be at peace.
Sorry for being a day off last week. I guess I can’t read a calendar.
I remember as a child that I hated that my sister wanted to be just like me. She wanted to wear the same clothes and do the same things I did. It drove me bonkers. Now being somewhat older I see the wisdom of following someone’s footsteps. There is a lot that we can learn from others. The trouble is not seeing the bad habits or things that we shouldn’t copy. Be mindful if you are mentoring or guiding some young mind (young at any age). Try to be mindful of your own actions because someone might be learning from you and you aren’t even aware of it. Teach and be taught always and forever.
One can not sustain happiness all of the time. (Excerpt from The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet)
This book I am reading has some very good points in it. A person truly cannot hope to be happy every moment of the day. It is nearly impossible to hold that level of emotion for any length of time. It normally wanes into contentment. I was always annoyed when people would say, “Be happy!” because I knew you couldn’t sustain it. So keep that in mind when society is pushing you to always be happy. You don’t have to! It is ok to have sad times or angry times. That is normal and 100% acceptable. It is your actions when you are in any emotion that defines you, not the actual emotion.
I think I am up to 36 books this year, but who’s counting.
The Posionwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver Just wow. This is a fantastic story about a Southern Baptist Preacher who takes his family into the Congo to convert the locals. If you don’t know anything about southern Baptist Preachers, let me tell you they are fire and brimstone kind of people. The story is told from the voice of the wife and four daughters. I always am amazed when an author can break themselves into so many voices well. It’s not an easy thing. The end drags a little but totally a great read.
Rebel of the Sands by Alwyn Hamilton This is a young adult book and reads very easily. It is a lovely story of an orphan trying to make her place in a male dominated world. Gives an insight into a culture that still doesn’t feel women are equal. It is fast and fun and adventurous. Great break from any serious reading.
The Night Circus by Erin Morganstern This was a fantastic book! Lots of magic and mystery. The story keeps moving between characters and a few different years but beyond that its a straight forward read. The characters are well developed and deep. If you love the circus this is a must read!
The Great Train Robbery by Michael Crichton As always Crichton produces a fantastic story full of interesting facts. This book has more information in it that you might feel like you should be taking notes. If you ever wanted to know about British criminals in the mid 1800s this is a must read. Intertwined in all these facts is a sly story about a train robbery.
This post has nothing to do with your mom. So don’t get all bent out of shape. This post is about my mother. She is here visiting. She drove 30 hours straight to get here, as if we were long lost friends. We are not. And only these visits remind me of that. Only when she is here do I fully remember why we live so far apart.
The planning for this trip was some months in the making. We spoke of all the fun things we were going to do. We were going to do mother daughter things like all the movies we had ever watched.
On day one we lounged all day. Well she did drive 30 hours straight with two very large dogs. I had spent the previous day cleaning. So it was nice just to nap and watch TV. Then after, I worked a day shifts and came home tired and hot. Its probably the hottest weekend while she is here and me without any AC. That first day she cooked. We sat and had a nice meal and then afterwards I did dishes and she dozed and played on her device. Not much was said. I couldn’t tell if I had done anything. So I went to bed. This seemed to be the going rate over the weekend. Me working and mom quiet. There were a couple times when I asked where something was or why something was left out and mother always played the victim. “Oh I’ve messed up again.” “The dog house for me.” I wasn’t accusatory just asking for information. There are other traits I see in her that I’ve spent years purging out of me. The no communication and lack of decision making for starters; the nabbing, biting comments too. I have been trying hard to be nonreactive to her words and actions but its not easy. I luckily haven’t had the time to dwell too much on things. We have had some fun. My town put on a mini festive for kind of end of season sales at the businesses downtown. We walked through that. It was my roomie’s anniversary and I take her out since her hubby can’t make it. I even took her kayaking. I had planned a surprise sunrise horse back ride for us. So its not like I’m leaving her behind. I do try to play the good daughter. However, its not a good fit for us. I wish there was someway that it could be fixed. Somehow I could change my feelings and make our relationship more compatible. My new goal is now to just have a mother (in law) suite and she can do her thing and we can meet up. That would probably be the best for us.
Roomie and I drove down with her to the next big city and sent her off well. Good food and drinks. What more can a person want? Plus we got to go shopping. HEHE.
I don’t have anything this Sunday other then Get Out and See Something! GO watch a movie you wouldn’t normally. GO and try a meal that you wouldn’t normally try. GO talk to a stranger! Surprise yourself and try something new!!!!
As a child my favorite letter was Y. That is also my favorite word; why. I wanted to know how things worked, how people thought, and the reason for everything. I remember getting told by my parents to clean my room or do some chore and I wanted to know the reason behind that request. I wanted to know the interworking of thought that lead to that request. As an adult I respond much better when someone asks me to do something and the give the reason why. While this might be a good trait to have, maturity shows that it should be used sparingly. Sometimes it is better not to ask why and think though the situation. This will help you grow and become a better critical thinker. Also sometimes letting things unfold without knowing every detail is worth the bit of excitement. Your thoughts?